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5 ways being a blogger is like being on a reality TV show!

October 1, 2017 22 Comments

I have come to the realisation that bloggers are a bizarre breed  of people and that blogging is the most peculiar pursuit. Let me explain why…

Two nights ago I was out with my friends, the Expat Felines, and every time they introduced me to their other friends, the phrase that followed the perfunctory introduction was:

“She is an amazing blogger! You need to read her blog!”

I know they do it because they love the blog and are proud of me but they also know that I cringe a little whenever this happens (and they love making me slightly uncomfortable). To be perfectly honest, I secretly wish that no one I know in real life would ever read this blog. In fact, I’ve heard a lot of bloggers say that they didn’t even share their blog with their families and friends when they started – some still haven’t.

Why didn’t I think of that?!

Every once and a while I’ll meet someone on a plane or at a party who seems really interested in my teaching and travels so they keep asking questions, and every once and a while I’ll eventually tell them that, actually, they can read more about it on my blog!

But I never say it without blushing slightly and scanning the room for a quick escape, because I know they’re about to ask what my blog address is, and I’m going to have to say “Expat Panda Dot Com.” 

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It is an odd thing- I put my words online hoping to reach people but when I do reach them, I feel so uncomfortable about it. This is why I feel like I am on a reality TV show. Just like reality TV, this blog provides endless fascination about my global adventures, cringeworthy confessionals and personal experiences. As a blogger I indulge voyeurism by inviting you into my home, travel backpack and even my classroom thorough my words. My candidness makes me feel like I am on Big Brother sometimes. Lets see if you agree with me about my 5 reasons about why being a blogger is like being on a never-ending reality TV show:

 

  1. People treat you like a celebrity but… you’re not one

Most celebrities are famous because they have some sort of talent. For example, Russell Crowe is a great actor and Mariah Carey has an amazing voice. Naomi Campbell has a striking beauty and Lionel Messi is a fantastic soccer player. JK Rowling wrote the best books ever and Jamie Oliver is a whiz in the kitchen. I could go on but you get the picture. However, as bloggers what exactly is our talent? Are we proud of the fact that we are simply sharing our  THOUGHTS? I had a good think about this after a recent episode where I was in the middle of a street food festival and a person approached me:

Stranger: Hey! Expat Panda! I follow your blog!

Me: Um… thanks?

Stranger: You are so cool!

Me: ….

I am not naturally a socially awkward person; I do want to respond better but I don’t know how! So here I am, feeling like a celebrity because I am being recognised but I honestly don’t think I deserve the attention. All I do is write my thoughts…

But then again…. being approached is the same as being appreciated. Here are people who have been touched enough by your words and thoughts to bravely approach you in public without even being sure that you’re the face behind the blog. Its taken me some time but I am learning to value these personal encounters.

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Just kidding, I love you guys.

 

2. People expect you to take an avid interest in their life… because they are invested in yours

When I observe how invested people are in the Kardashian’s lives, it always surprises me. In my opinion, they don’t have a lot to offer the world (no discernible talents or redeeming qualities) yet people know the names of their kids and how much weight Khloe Kardashian lost sometime in the past. As a blogger, I feel like this too. People are so invested in my life (Panda, please write about your school experience/housing/trip to Croatia) that they automatically want to share their lives with me too.

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Every Wednesday evening, I take an hour to sit down and go through my Expat Panda email account (I can’t be the only person with 5 separate email accounts?). If you have emailed me before, you know that you may not get the answer within the same day (bloody hell, sometimes I might even take a week to reply), however there will be an answer eventually. But sometimes they may not be the responses you are looking for because well… I am not all-knowing. Here are some the things I have been asked:

– Do you think I can be a KG teacher? I have taught grade 6 for the last 10 years and don’t know if I could switch.

How would I know that? I have never been in a classroom with you.

-My German friends want to visit Oman… do they require a visa?

I am NOT an embassy, therefore I do not have information on all nationalities and their passport limitations.

-Do you think my boyfriend and I should get married before moving to the Middle East?

Um… Marriage is a big commitment, how can I answer that?

-I am currently 98kgs… Do you recommend that I lose about 20kgs before moving to Kuwait?

Wait, what? What does your weight have to do with me?

Sometimes people send me long emails outlining their travel itineraries and asking me if I approve of them. Each person travels differently and wants to achieve different things from their holiday. I don’t know what would work best for you!

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Female blogger problems run parallel to The Bachelor sometimes!

But then again… for every question that boggles my mind, there will be at least 4 heartwarming comments that make my day!

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3. Alliances will form

Your blog will allow you to interact with people. At first, only your mother will read your posts but a year later, you won’t have time to reply to all of the comments and interaction thats thrown at you! Between comments on the blog, discussion on Instagram and sometimes even Facebook comments, you are bound to meet people. Perhaps those alliances are simply virtual at first; there is definitely a group of bloggers whose posts I would prioritise reading, even though we have never met and even if I have no interest in the topic, purely because we have been engaging with each other online for ages so I love to read what they write.

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Most people read your blog and they feel like they know you but sometimes the feeling is so strong that they invite you to hang out with them in real life. When you meet, you are blown away because its like you’ve known them for years! If you’re lucky and they are a blogger too then its never a blind date because off you go to scour their blog first to find out whether you’re dealing with someone you actually want to meet. I’ve been SO incredibly fortunate to meet people who found my blog and approached me to hang out. A few of those bloggers have become exceptionally good friends to me and you can find their blogs here, here and here.

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This is how I feel when I realise I just made a lifelong friend through my blog… like a WINNER.

Do you know there are entire articles online about how to make friends through your blog but here I am, fortunate enough to have people gravitate toward me without any effort on my part?!

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But then again… once in a while you will meet someone and you’re just like, “Are you even the same person who writes that blog?!” They seem so open minded and interesting through their Instagram photos but when you meet them in real life, you’re left wondering who actually writes their witty captions on Instagram…

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4. You will do things you never thought you would do… for the blog

I remember watching people eat insects on Survivor, shaving their heads on The Amazing Race (the only reality TV show I enjoy) and throwing themselves at men on The Bachelor. I know that these people would never do these things in reality but the fact that they were on this show, competing for a prize, drove them to doing outrageous things. I feel like this about my blog. Sometimes all I want to do is sleep in but I will drag myself off to eat breakfast at an interesting cafe because I know, that in 3 months time, I want to publish a post about the best breakfasts in Kuwait .

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Oh wait- you thought that bloggers just wake up in the morning, scribble a few thoughts, publish and thats how a post is made? Seriously?

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I never in a million years thought I would visit places like Serbia, Tanzania and Swaziland. Yet, the off the beaten path destinations attract a lot of interest on the blog and this challenges me to find new and more intriguing destinations. The blog pushes me to spend less time sitting around my apartment watching Brooklyn Nine Nine, and more time exploring my surroundings.

But then again… sometimes its a constant battle of- am I going to blog about this experience? If so, I need to look presentable and tame my hair. That means I need to take my camera. Wait which camera- the GoPro or the Sony? Let me just pop both in my handbag after I charge them quickly while I change out of these terrible clothes. Oh and where is my tripod?! The worst is when you look great, have all your gear with you and the whole experience is so disappointing that you don’t end up putting it on Instagram never mind the blog.

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5. You will be judged

If you’ve ever watched any reality shows, you have probably been guilty of judging the people who compete in them. You have your favourites (oh he is so handsome!), the ones you can’t stand (why does she always have her cleavage on display?), the ones you identify with (he is doing exactly what I would do!) and oh so many more opinions. Being a blogger is similar- putting your views on the web mean that people will have an opinion about you and often… it isn’t what you want to hear.

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When I wrote about my trip to Serbia, people sent me messages telling me how I ‘advocate genocide’ because I enjoyed my time there. When I write about the times I experience racism while traveling or living abroad, white people leave comments such as “We get it, you’re not white. Write about something more relevant”.  Some of the other things I have heard from people are:

˝Stop wasting your time.˝
˝Why are you doing this, you´re never gonna make it.˝
˝All your blog does is make people feel bad about their lives.˝
˝You think any of your readers actually takes you seriously?!˝
¨Bloggers are just a bunch of spoiled brats who only care about their next post.˝
˝If you love kids and teaching so much why don’t you have your own children!?˝

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Truthfully, when I read and hear comments like this, I start to wonder if the blog is even worth the effort I put into it. You see, although some might think blogging is the easiest thing in the world, there is more to it than meets the eye. It can be quite time-consuming. The photo taking, the writing, the editing of both the photos and the text…it all takes hours to put together (especially because I am a perfectionist) and fitting it all in next to your busy schedule sometimes feels nearly impossible.

But then again… you will soon remember that your blog is amazing and there’s a whole community of bloggers and readers who are there for you- even when your personal life is falling apart and you’ve had the worst day ever, just opening up my slice of the internet reminds me that I am not alone!

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Ultimately, I blog for fun and as a writer, I find it an effective way to get thoughts out of my chaotic mind and into the world. I stopped thinking about the stats after I hit 20,00 and I definitely don’t lie awake at night wondering how to optimise search engine terms or whatever all that is about. For me that’s not what keeps me blogging. What I do love about blogging is that my little blog is not alone.  But rather, it is privileged to be in the good company of literally hundreds of thousands of other blogs that are written by amazing, smart, diverse, bold, talented people all around the world who are courageously sharing their thoughts on the web each day too.  You can find them blogging about everything from parenting to politics to pasta to Prada to persuasion to profitability and everything in between.  And you can catch a glimpse into any of their worlds with just one click.  ONE CLICK.

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The Information Age is here, no doubt.  Although opening up yourself and your life to the world wide web can seem overwhelming, it’s also wild and wonderful.  I’m so  thankful that it has carved a little space within it for my blog to make its home and that it has connected to you my amazing readers 🙂

 

Do you also feel like a reality TV show star as a blogger or do these crazy things only happen to me? Share your experience in the comments below!

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22 Comments

  • Britta October 1, 2017 at 8:11 pm

    My blog is no where near as popular as yours, but I do relate to some of what you’ve said. There are definitely times when I have felt a bit like a celebrity in the blogosphere. I’ve experienced fellow bloggers (whom I’ve never met in person, mind you) who have made me feel uncomfortable with their eagerness to get to know me. I’ve also wondered why I put myself out there on occassion and what’s the point of it all. When it all comes down to it, I love the people I’ve met through blogging. It’s amazing the friendships I’ve forged with people I’ve never met in person. I also love being able to look back at how far I’ve come in the last few years. The WordPress community is great, and it is so nice to have a little piece of the interwebs that is completely my own.

    • Expat Panda October 2, 2017 at 9:19 pm

      You have hit the nail on the head! Every blogger has bad days where they want to delete the entire domain but the truth is that the connections we have made through blogging-wither virtual or in person- keeps us going The WordPress community is utterly amazing and is probably one the main reasons I have been so consistent with my blog!

  • The girl in green scarf October 1, 2017 at 9:06 pm

    When I started my blog, I told my friends and my cousin sister, honestly speaking now I regret. I can’t share something with this community of mine because you don’t know what they will read and what will they think of it. I’m not a very social and confident person. I really don’t like people meeting me in public because I’m a blogger and my only mean of connecting should be comments (not so social and confident). Yes the struggles you have mentioned for the bloggers are true. This blogging community is so nice and welcoming and you are not alone in this. Tho I don’t have a lot of followers but I truly experience this all.

    • Expat Panda October 2, 2017 at 9:21 pm

      I totally understand you. I am somewhat of an introvert too so being recognized in public makes me very uncomfortable and sometimes I feel rather undecided about just how much of my life to share online. But ultimately, the people I have interacted with via the blog make it all worth it and this has allowed me to become more confident in my views

      • The girl in green scarf October 2, 2017 at 9:23 pm

        The wordpress community is so friendly and perfect. I wish we can undo or block few people of our family so that they can’t read our blogs. Ha ha

  • myboldspirit October 2, 2017 at 2:05 am

    Reblogged this on Bold Spirit Rising and commented:
    Why Blog? Put simply, to create, to get that weight off your chest and release it into the abyss.

    • Expat Panda October 2, 2017 at 9:22 pm

      Thanks for reblogging and sharing 🙂

  • AnneGrwll October 2, 2017 at 4:59 pm

    You took the words right out of my mouth from the first line… You’re right. It is very awkward to share your blog address. I mean, the frankness in the blog is way different from talking in person. Im one of those people who didn’t share about my blog for the first three months before it accidently slipped out and I had to give my blog address to my family and friends. I write about my experiences in real life, and try to find the maximum possible comic angle in the story so invariably, people will be included. It gets a bit weird for the person to be reading it from my side… But even though I don’t have a lot of followers, it’s amazing just to blog.

    • Expat Panda October 2, 2017 at 9:24 pm

      This is the essential conundrum- how being open on the blog doesn’t always translate well into reality. People have a certain expectation of me from what they have read on the blog and I thin that when they finally meet me, they are somewhat disappointed because I am rather introverted! Nevertheless I love sharing my thoughts with the world and for as long as there are people willing to read it, lets continue blogging!

  • josypheen October 2, 2017 at 8:51 pm

    Aww panda this is yet another excellent post!

    I am pretty shocked by the bitchy comments though. I mean, that is quite a lot of effort to log in and be mean to someone you don’t know!

    p.s I found your post about travelling with a S.A passport really interesting. It’s so strange that someone took that time to tell you its not relevant!

    • Expat Panda October 2, 2017 at 9:27 pm

      It’s a weird thing isn’t it? If I didn’t like what someone wrote, I just close their site and move on with my day. I would never feel the need to be nasty or pass judgement on their experiences but hey that’s just me. Some people feel validated by giving their opinion no matter how unwanted it may be! I am glad you enjoyed the post about my passport saga but it was rather controversial with certain more privileged people implying that I was using my race and nationality to garner popularity- If they knew what dram I go through every time I travel, they would of course never make such foolish remarks!

      • josypheen October 2, 2017 at 9:45 pm

        I’m similar. If I think a blog post is rubbish, then I just don’t comment. I can still appreciate that someone has put a huge amount of effort into writing that post in the first place.

        Privilege is a strange thing. Some people REALLY hate acknowledging that things might have been (even slightly) easier for them. That post was a real eye-opener.

  • chloevsworld October 3, 2017 at 2:26 pm

    Haha totally agree with “doing it for the blog”. I’m guilty of that too. This is a cool way to look at blogging, thanks for sharing 🙂 xo

    • Expat Panda October 3, 2017 at 8:00 pm

      I am so glad you enjoyed it! the trick is just not to get too caught up in doing things purely for the blog but rather, remembering to enjoy oneself too 🙂

  • KuwaitLifestyle(Ruwaishid) October 10, 2017 at 7:36 am

    I do completely agree with you but the email part did get me XD….I’m one of those who have more than 5 email accounts I know the feeling of frustration you go through everyday replying those mails even if it’s a hate message….I always post about being positive and never judge to anyone, sometimes towering rage people will show just because you are sharing your optimistic nature. Sure does hurt, which made me feel like removing my blog but I made up my mind to ignore those and to post in rare occasions at least.

  • Julie Cao October 16, 2017 at 6:48 am

    Totally hearing you on feeling uncomfortable to share your blog with your family and friends. I feel like dying when my friends read my blog in front of me. It just so awkward. I also freak out when meeting other bloggers. I think the reason is that as a blogger we have dual or multiple personalities, and we have to play different roles. And it’s hard to reveal the parts people don’t know about. Like our family knows us well, but they will never know our online personlaity, and it would be strange for them to find out.

    • Expat Panda October 17, 2017 at 6:30 pm

      I would DIE if people read my blog out in front of me… that is CRINGE-WORTHY! I totally agree with playing different roles… the struggle is always between revealing too much but still being authentic.

  • wwornheels November 14, 2017 at 9:42 am

    Hahahhaa. I’m a new blogger. My parents don’t know and I never told more than 5 people until after 6 months. I never formally announced, but if they don’t know who will read? I get what you mean!

  • Its Roshni August 8, 2018 at 2:21 pm

    I am a new blooger and i​ could relate to everything. Blogging is a way that helps me be who I am and lets me take ins​ight into issues. It’s hard to be too open because my friends read them, and sometimes its ​about family as well but I am learning and reading your blog gives me inspiratio ​​and a new hope!!

    • Expat Panda August 17, 2018 at 7:14 pm

      I think as time as goes on, you develop a blogger persona and friends and family
      learn not to take things too personally. As I told my ex husband who complained about the content on my blog: if you don’t like it, don’t read it. Blogging is a great method of organising your thought and no should take that away from you!!

  • Stephanie December 24, 2019 at 12:05 am

    I LOVE this blog post!!! I’ve just recently started blogging and still haven’t made any of the actual blog post public, just the website (www.stephaniestravel.com) for all the reasons you mention in this post! lol I cringe often when I see someone in the grocery store, my doctor during my appt 🤦🏻‍♀️, or a relative visiting when they say “hey, I read your latest Instagram post and I love following your travels”. I know they mean it as a compliment but I blush that what I write in privacy they are all reading..
    I just subscribed to your blog and I can’t wait to read all your post!!!! 💕

    • expatpanda December 24, 2019 at 2:39 pm

      Haha I HEAR YOU! The worst is when friends say, “THIS IS MY FRIEND AND SHE HAS A BLOG” and then you’re forced to discuss our social media with someone who has never even met you! Its enough make you cringe. My friends do it purposefully to annoy me haha! Thanks for subscribing 🙂

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